Monday, January 03, 2005

Official Name Changes

Today, in a move mentioned repeatedly over the past few months, but still shocking to anyone with common sense, the Anaheim Angels officially changed their name to the "Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim." Somehow, they say this will help marketing. Unfortunately, however, the replica uniforms will only be sold in XL and XXL to accomodate the team's full name on the front." Former SS David Eckstein was overheard to say: "I would have hated to have to use the front AND back of my uniform on the team name."

This led your truly to wonder if the LAAoA's will start a new trend in baseball. Research has shown me that the following potential name changes are already in the works.

Under the new MLB plan:

The Washington Nationals will become The Washington Nationals of Anacostia after a Brief Sojurn Somewhere Else

The Boston Red Sox will become The Boston Red Sox of What the Hell Do We Complain About Now

The New York Yankees will become The Kings of All They Survey (To always be said with an evil laugh by MLB mandate)

The Tampa Bay Devil Rays will Become The Crap Craps of Crap.

The New York Mets will become The Overspending Mets of Long Island.

The Atlanta Braves will become These Are the Atlanta Braves (to always be said by James Earl Jones by MLB mandate)

The Florida Marlins will become The Is This One of the Crappy Years or Do We Win the World Series?

The Chicago White Sox will become the South Side White Sox Who Haven't Sniffed a Series Since They Threw One

The Cleveland Indians will become the Cleveland Indians of Kill Us, Kill Us Now, For God's Sake Put Us Out of Our Misery and Kill Us Now

and finally,

The Philadelphia Phillies will become the Philadelphia Phillies of the This Is Going to Be the Year we Win the Ser...What? We're down, 1-0? This Team Freakin' Sucks!


At 9:56 AM, Blogger tmk67 said...

I never thought a team name ever could be worse than the Mighty Ducks of Anaheim. Did they even consider asking Fox to sponsor "The OC" Angels?

At 10:14 AM, Blogger DM said...

Backward K, you're so right. I thought Disney sold the team. I've never gotten used to Anaheim anyway -- I still call them California.

Why don't they just make their address and website part of their official name too?


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